ghadery

 

I need this concession: every milestone is an admission of defeat   first smile   first word   first step   first time on a train   first shutting of bedroom door in your face   each seal-clapped celebration   a marker of time  every first   a last  a page curling at the edges   a day we once held each other fast   fetal and milky with sleep

Hollay Ghadery is a multi-genre writer living in Ontario on Anishinaabe land. Fuse, her memoir of mixed-race identity and mental health, was released by Guernica Editions in 2021 and won the 2023 Canadian Bookclub Award for Nonfiction/Memoir. Her collection of poetry, Rebellion Box was released by Radiant Press in 2023, and her collection of short fiction, Widow Fantasies, is scheduled for release with Gordon Hill Press in fall 2024. Her debut novel, The Unraveling of Ou, is due out with Palimpsest Press in 2026, and her children’s book, Being with the Birds, with Guernica Editions in 2027. Hollay is a co-host of Angela’s Bookclub on 105.5 FM, as well as HOWL on CIUT 89.5 FM. She is also the Poet Laureate of Scugog Township. Learn more about Hollay at www.hollayghadery.com

(Image courtesy of Rona Maynard)

(Title, Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet)

schellenberg



My pottery teacher told me, What makes pottery precious is the fingerprints you leave in the clay. I don’t know what my parents did with the frog bowl I sculpted for them, but they made me sign the Dollarama frog I bought. They wanted to hold onto who it came from. This flawless thing. My Dad never let us eat in the car. Cheezies, with their orange dust, reserved for picnics in parks with sinks. My pottery teacher, my brother, my friend; pancreas, liver, breast. Some factory settings are random. After chemo, my niece’s hair grew back curly. The Saturday before Christmas, she looked perfect as a present in her box. On Christmas afternoon, I bite into a carrot. I need to feel something inside me snap. They say Cheezies are like snowflakes and people: no two are the same.

♦♦♦

Angeline Schellenberg is the author of three full-length poetry collections: Tell Them It Was Mozart (Brick Books, 2016), Fields of Light and Stone (UAP, 2020), and Mondegreen Riffs (At Bay Press, forthcoming 2024). Angeline works as a contemplative spiritual director, second shooter at Anthony Mark Photography, and host of the Speaking Crow poetry open mic in Winnipeg. She enjoys hunting the riverbank for beautiful broken things. AngelineSchellenberg.wordpress.com

*Note: The final line is from a quote by W.T. Hawkins Inc. manager Shirley Woodcock in https://www.intelligencer.ca/news/local-news/bellevilles-own-cheezie-are-like-snowflakes-and-people-no-two-are-alike

 

litter - haines

this past summer, a little high,
i plunged into the pacific. shoved
an empty bottle of lager, all
that was left in the fridge, under
my beach bag so, i wouldn’t forget it

at the end of the day. the tide comes in
and swallows the beach. in the saltwater,

i float, gulping back the grief that still comes
unbidden. the pain of mother loss acts like sea suck.

the give and take, the mostly take. the ache pulled
through my throat each time i try to breathe past this loss.

a nudist, half-hidden behind a collection
of driftwood offers space. a kind of easy

companionship. neither of us asking anything
of the other. each of us ignoring what the other wants

to hide. his flesh. my guilt. an addiction squirming
below skin. and i’m trying not to drown in it.

no extraordinary measures

the thing is, after my mother’s death
i drank myself tattered for a little while.
there is some measure of relief
in recognizing this. the way aching made
me ravenous. and now, the way I’ve begun
to think of grief as a sapling. the ways, i feed it.
i do not know if it was better to starve.

Rayanne Haines (she/her) is the author of three poetry collections, the creator and host of the literary podcast Crow Reads, the President for the League of Canadian Poets and an Assistant Professor with MacEwan University. Her 2021 hybrid poetry collection, Tell the Birds Your Body is Not a Gun won the Stephan G. Stephansson Alberta Literary Award and was shortlisted for both the Robert Kroetch award and the ReLit Award. She’s been published in the Globe and Mail, Minola Review, Fiddlehead, Grain, Prairie Fire and others. A CNF poetry and essay collection exploring grief after mother loss, identity, and gendered trauma is forthcoming from Frontenac House September 2024 

kishkan

I am looking at old maps of Vancouver showing the buried creeks, blue lines forming a tangle under the grid of streets, the names almost forgotten: Salish Stream, Spanish Banks Creek, Still Creek: their sibilant waters under parks, under streets, meandering just below the surface of parking lots and shopping malls, still alive in family stories danced into being, in dance itself along Brewery Creek, its remaining shadow on streets and alleys . Where the creeks begin: in seepage, in snow-melt, in small springs rising from slopes, they begin, a trickle, gathering, growing, they become themselves, cascading over stones, wearing channels in rock, runoff and groundwater, fringed with willows, salmonberry, alders, they find their own patient way to lakes or harbours, they empty, little riffles over the sand and pebbles.  Their courses fill with rain, fallen leaves, the exoskeletons of mayflies, dragonflies, drowned navigator shrews who misjudged distance from bank to bank, a sodden paper bag, forgotten bottles of wine left by lovers who picnicked then walked into the sunset, arms wrapped around each other.  I am looking at old maps of Victoria, threaded with Bowker Creek, Cecelia Creek, Johnson and Rock Bay Creeks, East Creek and Fairfield Creek in the Ross Bay Cemetery where as a child I pressed my ear to the ground, expecting to hear the dead and instead, water, water, lilting in its pipes and brickworks, the weight of trees planted a century before, headstones, mausoleums, families united finally in small fenced plots. I am looking at maps. I am remembering the sound of water underground, the mint growing in the damp ground where a creek passed under a park across from our house on its way to Ross Bay, and I am remembering a walk along Colquitz Creek when a section long-buried was daylighted after years of hard work on the part of volunteers, a stray balloon still tied to a tree after the celebration; I remember hearing voices of school children eager to release their hatchery salmon, a few dogs up to their ankles, the last of the orchard trees quickening to the sound of riffles, birdsong, a dipper fishing for insects in the quick water, the old culvert left in the grass.

♦♦♦

Theresa Kishkan lives on the Sechelt Peninsula with her husband, John Pass, in a house they built and where they raised their 3 children. She has published 16 books, most recently Euclid’s Orchard, a collection of essays about family history, botany, mathematics, and love (Mother Tongue Publishing, 2017); a novella, The Weight of the Heart (Palimpsest Press, 2020), in which a young graduate student attempts to create a feminist cartography with the works of Ethel Wilson and Sheila Watson; and Blue Portugal and Other Essays (University of Alberta Press, 2022), a collection of lyrical essays. Her books have been nominated for many awards, including the Hubert Evans Award and the Ethel Wilson Prize. Her interests include textiles, ethnobotany, music, human and physical geography, and colour theory, strands of which are braided together in Blue Portugal. Current work-in-progress includes a novel, Easthope, and a long essay about the male gaze, painters and their models, and obsession.

She can be found online here.

a piece landed at your feet
like a blue bird’s wing,
which you picked up
and folded
into an uneven square,
pressed it into the breast pocket
of your plaid jacket,
the one you found
at the thrift store
on the discount rack,
it was too big but you liked
the way it hung
loose at the sleeves,
covering your hand’s thin bones,
which fluttered unexpectedly
especially when drinking tea,
causing it to slosh
onto the paper napkin,
this too you folded,
lining up the edges
into triangles –
a kite or a paper plane,
something to propel you
into that open space
untethered

♦♦♦

Joan Conway’s love for the culture and geography of Northern British Columbia strongly influences her work. She sees her writing as an avenue to create social change, build community, and to celebrate life. She is published in several anthologies and literary journals. Most recently her poetry appears in ‘don’t tell: family secrets’ (Demeter Press, 2022) and Dreamers Creative Writing Magazine, 2022, for her creative nonfiction. Joan recently launched her memoir ‘Weave As A River’, 2023. 

She is the co-editor for Fresh Voices, an online publication for the League of Canadian Poets.

joanconwaywriter.com

https://greenblossomstudio.wordpress.com

mockler

When the sun goes down, close your eyes, and I’ll tell you a story.

It’s a story about a wave—a big one, the kind that threatens an undertow if you’re not careful.

This is not advice but a warning.

In this story, I will be a stone, and you can be a seashell or a fishbone or the head of a plastic doll with blue hair someone’s child left behind. On the ride home, when the child remembers the doll, his favourite doll, whose head he gleefully ripped from its body and tossed aside, he cries out—a long and remorseful cry—but it’s too late to turn back now and retrieve it.

The trick, if there is one, is to wash up on the shore and not get dragged down to the bottom of the ocean.

Sometimes the water is calm, but not today, not in this story.

Yes, of course, if you want to be a grain of sand, then be a grain of sand, but you won’t necessarily fare any better.

Kathryn Mockler is the author of the story collection Anecdotes (Book*hug, 2023). She co-edited the print anthology Watch Your Head: Writers and Artists Respond to the Climate Crisis (Coach House Books, 2020) and is the publisher of the Watch Your Head website. She also runs Send My Love to Anyone, a literary newsletter. 

litter - simmers

Bunched like discarded tissue,
origami kisses blown to profit, companies,
the ssible ink of capitalism.

The news unspooled like a mixtape, words
weathered into sun and wind, all dep, ould, edia
come spring. Paper returning to the pulp

from which it was formed. Until, over, ahead—time’s
obscene political leanings, how it exists outside
the frame. And within in it. Post-hurricane

sandstone coastline cartwheels into the sea.
Note the pale green fossil layer—prehistoric
footprint exposed by storm surge.

Fossil or rock? Give it a lick.
Decomposed inorganic minerals
from bone will stick to the tongue. Gather

the jou left and assemble into sense:
people the millions on the page.
Radio something new.

Bren Simmers is the winner of the 2022 CBC Poetry Prize and the author of four books including the wilderness memoir Pivot Point (Gaspereau Press, 2019) and If, When (Gaspereau Press, 2021). She lives on Epekwitk (PEI).

www.brensimmers.com.

gagliese

Welcome to our little cul-de-sac. Your family’ll be happy here. It’s quiet, and most folks are friendly. You’ll learn soon enough who isn’t.

Well, since you ask, just between us, number 103, right across the street.

Happened last night, about midnight, my wife fast asleep. The guy who lives there starts shouting. He’s this big bear of a guy, radio-announcer voice.

No, don’t worry, they can’t see us; their curtains are drawn. Besides, likely still in bed. Mrs. Saunders, her backyard abuts theirs, says they aren’t what you’d call morning people. But he’s been ill, so—

No, don’t know exactly. Lots wrong with him, apparently. Regardless, last night, he was in fine form. I hear his booming voice. Angry, vile words. I step out onto my porch, just in case.

No, there’s never been trouble before, but that doesn’t mean there won’t be. Anyway, I’m out there in my robe and so is he, bigger than ever. His wife’s cowering in the doorway.

No, he didn’t see me. So, he’s holding this basket, throwing slippers from it. My wife thinks it’s probably the one they keep for company. Not that they ever have company, not even my wife anymore, not since he called her a nosy hen. So, he’s throwing slippers, bellowing. He stops, says something I can’t hear, and she, no kidding, she kneels in front of him and takes his slippers off his feet.

No, I tell you, I saw it plain as day. The porch light was on. Those are his slippers there – grey flip-flop and brown loafer. Mismatched because they say he’s got one foot that’s hot and one that’s cold. Flip-flop cools, loafer warms.

No, no clue what causes that. Doesn’t matter. As I was saying, she hands him the flip-flop. He throws it. The loafer, same thing. Then she yanks off her own slippers, the red booties right there, and he throws those, too. By now, I’m about ready to call the police. Seems to me, he’ll go after her next, and she’s nothing but a slip of a girl. At least a foot shorter and two hundred pounds lighter than him. But I’m wrong. In an instant, I swear, he seems to deflate, this giant. I’ve never seen anything like it. He’s crying, wailing, sobbing. A man that size.

Great question. Well, my wife or yours would be packing. But not her. She’s been his nurse too long for that, my wife explained this morning. Sainted, she said, never a thought for herself. Instead of giving him what for, she wipes his tears, or so it looks from a distance. She caresses his face, anyway, and he leans into her, arm around her shoulders, his weight on her. They stand there like that for a bit, bare-footed mind you, and then she guides him indoors. Soon, all the lights are out. Show’s over.

I assume she’ll be out to gather them up. But you have a point. In this neighbourhood, we do leave unwanted stuff by the curb for anyone to take. On second thought, go ahead. Help yourself, take a pair, take two. Good as new after a wash.

In fact, my wife might like these moose slippers.

♦♦♦

Lucia Gagliese’s stories have appeared in Best Canadian Stories–2021, The New Quarterly, This Will Only Take a Minute (Guernica), The Healing Muse, and others. She is a clinical psychologist and professor at York University in Toronto.

Photo credit: Alice Zorn

 

How this site works is that I send a photo of a piece of litter to a writer somewhere in Canada and they respond in any form.

Those are the instructions: you may respond in any form.

Most often it’s poetry or short fiction or personal essay. On a few occasions the response is another image. Debbie Ridpath Ohi and Kevin Sylvester come to mind. In the case of Marthe Jocelyn, she asked if I could send, not a picture but an ACTUAL PIECE OF LITTER so that her response could be something (litter-ally) made from the object. I tried to find something that a) wasn’t overly disgusting, and b) easy to mail.

The litter gods were kind.

This is what I found.

I popped it in the mail, not beginning to imagine what it would become.

may 3-2

This is what happened next.

litter - jocelyn

“Visual Literacy is an earlier & more intuitive skill than reading; kids recognize faces, objects, pictures, and logos, long before they can understand text. Visual literacy inspires the same interpretive skills that reading eventually will — to find meaning (and humour) in what you see.” ~ Marthe Jocelyn

Marthe Jocelyn has written — and sometimes illustrated— fifty books for young readers. Her pictures are collages made of paper, fabric, and found bits & bobs. She has lived mostly in New York City and Stratford, Ontario. 

Website: marthejocelynbooks.com

Instagram: @scissorhouse

♦♦♦

torn

Posted: April 8, 2022 in kim fahner
Tags: , , , ,

fahner

Use your teeth. No need for scissors. Grab a hold of it, by the corner maybe. Bite down. Tear. Don’t be precious about it. Or, instead, use scissors on the top, and then let the dog rip at the bottom. What you want and can’t have, so now want it more. Love. Peace. Fill in your own blank as needed.

The bottom’s fallen out, or it’s been ripped out. Is it just the bag, your life, or maybe the whole world?

Upended, so that everything falls out all at once.  

On the news, images cluster: the shell of a school, burnt out, in Kharkiv; an old man feeding four cats from one can of stew, spooning it onto the pavement with care; children in the Krakow train station being given balloon animals to comfort them after long journeys; women weaving a camouflage net onto a chicken wire frame; a wedding in a war zone, bride and groom both khaki clad—holding roses in their hands, so hopeful.

Here, somewhere in Canada, a bag with the bottom ripped out. Left behind.

Here, and there, the world ripped open, so torn apart.

Scatter rose petals. Try hard.

Then, try harder.  

Cultivate peace through protests and poems.

Imagine the scent of rosewater, distilled from the essence of Ukrainian wedding flowers.

Then, think of hope, and of how peace blooms much too slowly in the spring of yet another pandemic year. These patterns, how you wish they could be broken. Not to be repeated.

Kim Fahner writes and lives in Sudbury, Ontario. Her most recent book of poems is These Wings (Pedlar Press, 2019) and her new book of poems, Emptying the Ocean, will be published by Frontenac House in Fall 2022. Kim is a member of the League of Canadian Poets, the Ontario Representative of The Writers’ Union of Canada, and a supporting member of The Playwrights Guild of Canada. She may be reached via her website at www.kimfahner.com

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